Stim Queen: What The Hell is a Stim?

 I roleplay as Entrapta... Intimacy is a key part of my role, as I try to portray, along with the guy who plays Hordak (don't worry, he is paying for his actions), an empowered Disabled couple (Again, Autism IS a Disability) who tries to show Etherians Disabled people CAN and WILL have intimate times (and NO inmate times) (Intimacy is a topic for later). Even in that kind of roleplay, i stim. I make noises, i handflap, move my head... I've never been intimate in real life, but I feel of course i would stim during those practices. I always do it when I have my food cravings fulfilled, so, why not stim when i fulfill other cravings?

But hey, What the Hell is a stim? Well, they are those  tiny actions that EVERYONE, mostly Autistics, ADHDers and Anxious people do EVERYTIME. Again. and Again. and Again. It can be listening to the same song, everyday, under the same circunstances (ex: listening to Bon Jovi's "Story of My Life" EVERYTIME YOU DO HOMEWORK), or moving your hips repeatedly while standing up, or whispering (to yourself, in my case) "Hey Adora" repeatedly.

So, why do we stim? It is mostly because of two stuff.

1.Relieve stress: Haven't you bitten your nails when you are stressed? Well, I do.

2. Express feelings. We see Entrapta do noises all the time, and THAT'S A STIM.

Speaking of Entrapta, i believe it's time for some images, or videos: 

[Image description: Entrapta, from She-Ra and The Princesses of Power, plays with her hands]

[Image description: Scorpia, from She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, bites one of her claws]

These are two sides of the same coin (aside from the fact SCORPIA DESERVES DIAGNOSIS TOO #Cripbaiting): A good and a bad stim.

Moving your hands is quite good, even if ABA, which i've already covered here, says otherwise. People do this all the time, maybe unconciously, but, believe me, it's fun, and, why not do it? 

On the other hand, biting your nails is not that good. I sometimes do it after large periods of stress, and that often ends in me drawing blood from my fingers, which is quite disturbing.

So, what to do if you Autistic loved one hurts themself? If they bang their head against the wall, or pull their hair, or bite their nails? First, understand where it could possibly come from:

1. They may be having a sensory hard time: Maybe the light is too bright, or there's too much noise... It's causing pain, and they try to distract it with another one. They may even have a migraine. That's why AAC is important, to know when something goes wong in your loved one's body

2. They are really frustrated: Maybe you are caring for them after a trauma due to abuse, and they're trying to block a flashback? Maybe there's a change in routine? Try to be with them, and just reassure them with kind and soft words. ASK BEFORE HUGGING (Yes, even Scorpia should acknowledge this)

[Image description: Scorpia hugging Catra without her consent. Of course catra tries to get out from the white-haired girl's arms. Scorpia is cute, and i acknowledge a possible neurodivergence, but we should ALWAYS ASK FOR CONSENT BEFORE HUGGING ANYONE... So, if your Autistic Loved One's hurting, ASK. DON'T TOUCH. JUST... KIND WORDS. SPECIALLY WITH A TRAUMATIZED CHILD.]

After identifying what happens, act. Cut the bad sensory input, reassure your loved one with some kind words, etc.

And if it happens again, redirect.

Let's remember Scorpia biting her claw. She could use chewelry, which are accesories designated to be chewed in order to stim safely. There's even discrete ones that look like... You guessed it: TINY FOOD!!

[Image description: A chewelry necklace that looks like an Oreo cookie]

So, actually, DON'T STOP A STIM UNLESS IT'S HARMFUL. LOUD HANDS ARE PROUD HANDS. 

[Image description: Fanart by Barbra Darly on Tumblr. It shows Entrapta with hands in the air, her prehensile hair mimicking hands which flap over a Nuerodiversity rainbow infinity loop]